Shortly after my daughter Serena passed away (2018), I was thrust into a deep and unimaginable grief– and simultaneously into an unexpected and expansive realm.
That’s one of the surprising gifts of deeply grieving someone we love–it will kick your ass so hard you’ll hardly be able to function, it will render your rational mind obsolete– which will naturally guide you to develop new skills and senses. And, as if for the first time, you’ll learn to breathe and live life one moment at a time because that’s all you can safely manage.
In times of stillness– when you’re quiet enough, or open or exhausted enough, new ideas and life will be breathed into you– as if God/the universe is saying: “this is not the end!“
Although I’ve been a long-time student and teacher of human agency (personal leadership), psychology, and energy medicine, the idea of ‘personal power’ was something that only became real to me during my grief and its recovery process. I would say to myself “love (power) is in me and all around me“– “I can harness this power anytime I want or need it!” Often times I would bring to mind a sweet drawing my youngest daughter Camille drew when she was 11 or so– the ‘love plant’ (shown below).
In ways that I can’t explain and that defy conventional logic, that sweet image gave me strength and fortitude. It ‘powered’, enlivened, and energized me when my mind and body were on permanent low-battery mode.
Inspiration as in “when a new idea is breathed into you”, can occur any time. That which we’re inspired to do will sometimes seem odd or counter-cultural– something that may go against the prescribed path of life, and yet, without it, life, your life, will feel not quite right.
What’s often missing is simply the battery-power, our own ‘personal power plant’, to give us the needed charge and sustaining energy to bring forth our inspirations. What’s also needed is for others to encourage us and to say, “do what’s in your heart to do!”– to bring out the best in each other and support one another to grow towards the light.